wait, what?

Thank You For The

My birthday gift to fandom. A ficlet where Gerard and Mikey are aliens, coated in venom, looking for their mates.

No, no. Don't thank me. It's not necessary.

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Fic written for my birthday! :O

Feels Like The Very First Time, by romantical. Waycest! Talking about Gerard's hair! Hot and bros and written just for meeeee. \o/

And fic not written for my birthday but I'm pretending it was:
A first time for everything, by gorgeousnerd, Pete/Mikey with Star Wars pajamas.

Today I am probably going to leave work early; tonight I'm seeing Snow White and the Huntsman with friends; tomorrow friends and I are going to drive out to the beach for a picnic. Should be lovely. I'm jazzed. :)

Goals for this year:
- Save for a trip to Iceland before my next birthday. (revision of my original travel goal of going to Russia for the Olympics in 2014; Iceland is cheaper and can be done on a more short-term gratification timeline. /o/) I'm aiming for April of next year. I want to see PONIES. And volcanoes. (mostly ponies)
- Learn how to date. :| I've gone on exactly one actual date in my life and it was an OKCupid disaster. I have no idea how to go ABOUT this goal (...do any of you know any single dudes-who-like-ladies in the DC area? I TRUST YOUR JUDGMENT), but it will be a thing I try to work on this year.


And finally, my favorite cat macro of all time, which I only get to post once a year.



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After Battle


As after battle, we examine each other’s skin, trace the surface
From shoulder to shoulder and then down the spine, to the calf
And returning to the chest, its cavity & beat:
You are here

Amazingly whole. What you lost, undetectable. We have
Already forgotten the epithets of insult blazoned
On our brows. The high points have turned dull in the eaves
Of purpose, memory: ears tune forward. Somehow, injured

We become most familiar, sub-species unto sub
Species, and then peculiar. What ordinary causes of war
We weave into tales of centaurs, imps, & other
Animals. What makes us human is not enough to explain

The anger love breeds. The narrow stretches that pump to
And fro the heart. Entering & leaving, the blood warms. The heat,
Both plot & message: o the sweat I wipe away, the sweat
You wipe away.

[Karen Lepri]

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The Singing of the Dead, Dana Stabenow. Kate Shugak #11. MS. STABENOW YOU ARE FRUSTRATING THE SHIT OUT OF ME. And yet I've already downloaded #12. There's enough good in the series still to keep me cruising past the bad. Also this one focused in on Alaska again instead of trying to do geopolitics.

The Hitman's Guide to Housecleaning, Hallgrimur Helgason. I think this must have been a booksontheknob purchase. I can't imagine where I came across it otherwise. It's about a hitman for the Croatian Mafia who has to hide out in Iceland. It's very strange. Enjoyable! But strange. Also it doesn't really END so much as it just abruptly stops.


I have exciting plans for this weekend. \o/ I'm not really big on birthdays, but DOING FUN THINGS WITH FRIENDS with birthday as pretext, that I am down for.

Also romantical sent me the prettiest picture of La Sagrada Familia in Barcelona as a present, so I need a frame for that and a good place to hang it. Let's all run off to Barcelona right now and spend a day or two drooling over Gaudi.

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They are all works in progress.

1. Your understanding is not required. Your compassion is.

Whenever a thought or sentence starts with "But I don't understand why they--" where "they" is any identity-group that I am not a part of, check that and remind myself that I don't have to understand. My understanding is not required. My compassion and respect for mutual humanity is.

2. Nobody owes you anything.

Even if I love them. Even if I don't understand why they aren't giving me [x]. Even if I'm angry about it. Even if I REALLY REALLY WANT IT.

They owe me nothing. Keeping score and thinking of it that way, building up resentment, hurts me, hurts my relationships, and doesn't change the fundamental reality of human interaction.

3. Nobody can see your subtext.

I think: "I am being an asshole [because I'm hurt and upset and I want to make them realize they were wrong]."

They see: "She is being an asshole [footage not found]."


Onward and onward...

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one foot in and one foot back

Charlize Theron/Kristen Stewart. Domestic-ish.

Title from The Avett Brothers.

Idea sparked by a conversation with sohotrightnow, thanks to lalejandra and anoneknewmoose for various and sundry encouragement. :)

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I grew up on country music radio. Country music of the 90s, a strange and feral genre indeed. I haven't listened to country radio since roughly 2004, when I was introduced to Bruce Springsteen and absolutely everything got weird. Still, sometimes it comes back to me.

Like in the shower this morning, when I started singing an old Lee Roy Parnell song for no reason. And remembered that country music of the 90s was super-fucked-up..

Attend:
There ain't nothin' wrong, but there ain't nothin' right
Try to figure it out, boy, you're wasting your time.

What she needs is a tender moment
A loving word and the touch of your hand
All it takes is a tender moment
Let her know you'll always be her man
THAT'S the kind of thing a woman understands

:|

I stood there, razor in hand, water up over my ankles because our shower drain is kind of blocked and I need to make a maintenance request but I keep forgetting, and said DAMN, Lee Roy Parnell. Damn.

Then I switched over to "That Summer," the Garth Brooks song about a teenage boy losing his virginity to an older lady farmer. We should talk about "That Summer" AUs in comments.

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I am working on a fic that I am either going to be REALLY proud of or REALLY embarrassed by. There is no middle ground. \o/ Possibly going to be one of those "pst, honey, your id is showing" moments. ::adjusts skirt primly::

alpheratz pointed out that I haven't done a booklog post lately, which is true! I have not been reading. :( The last few books I've had lined up have kind of stalled out for me a few chapters in. Does anyone have anything awesome and remarkable to rec? Fiction or non. I'll give just about any genre a spin if it's well-written and is character-driven.

GAME OF THRONES FANS: HEY. PAY ATTENTION TO THIS PART. ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE A VIDDER.
So poisontaster gave me this song on a mix just about exactly a year ago, and ever since the first time I heard it all I could think was "this needs to be a Cersei vid." And by some of the screencaps and such I've seen around from last night's episode, all of the footage necessary now exists. So please check out this song, and if you are a vidder, make that happen? :D?
Jonathan Brooke, "Prodigal Daughter". I will discuss my ~vision in comments if anyone wants to. /o/

Cool fic that I can't remember if I've recced or not:
Can't Touch My Brother by alpheratz. The one where Mikey can't feel anything but Gerard's touch. Wayest. If you don't understand why that summary is great, this fic is not for you.

Happy Accidents by lalejandra. Fic written on Twitter and then cleaned up, where Mikey watches Bob Ross and paints as part of his therapy. Sweet and lovely.

Little Gabe (A Bedtime Story) by lalejandra. Nonsexual ageplay with Gabe, his Cobras, and Pete. This has some stunning insight into Gabe.

Hush, Hush (Keep It Down Now by romantical. Tom Conrad, William Beckett, and a gag. Yes.

Burning the Ground by romantical. Travie/Pete, casual drug use, this pairing is so great why are all fics not this pairing.

Run Full Speed by la_dissonance. Ryan Luciani/Sean Van Vleet, leaving-the-band fic and after of aching rightness.


So there you go, some stuff to read.

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alpheratz and I were allowed on email unsupervised again! \o/

Theoretical AO3 tags for this: sibling incest, fantasy tropes, throbbing members, capslock, drama

( courtesan gerard and his brotherguard )

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Get Up And Go
Mikey Way: Ultramarathon Runner

Thanks to alpheratz, romantical, and bellethemoose for their encouragement. ♥

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I finished a draft of ultramarathon runner Mikey! \o/

Considering that I was seriously considering packing it in and not writing any more at all, this feels pretty good. It's kind of cracky and odd and I wrote it just for myself and my own heart, and I'm proud of that.


In other news I turned the air conditioning on finally, and Racetrack is the HAPPIEST kitty.

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This morning on Twitter I was talking about how I wanted fic that dug into and examined what it MEANS that Gerard's hair is currently its natural color for the first time in his adult life. And that if it was Waycest, that would be okay with me.

alpheratz and I had a delightful email chatfic experience about this, which I now share with you.

( bros )

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This is an ongoing series on my Twitter. I promised alpheratz a picspam version if she completed a to-do list. And so.

( baby animals that look like Waybros (and a few others) )

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Today has mostly been migraine terribleness, but let's talk about this instead.

( gabe hotness )

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I am at chez likeadeuce, lying on her couch like a potato while she runs errands. Last night when I got here I informed her that I had driven all the way here under the impression that there was a Taco Bell at her exit, but that was not true, so I was very hungry and sad, and she took me to Taco Bell and then we watched all three of this week's episodes of Community. \o/ She is a great friend.

Also, apparently I'm going to need to treat those three eps as the last episodes of Community ever, because this is what NBC and Sony did to Dan Harmon, and I have no interest in a Community that isn't his vision. So.

Pete makes the best Star Wars nerd joke everrrr. OBSCURE CHARACTERS FTW. I choose to believe that if Mikeyway had not given up Twitter due to being too hipster for it (he uses social networks that don't even exist yet), he would have been in.

Also I'm sad about not being at Bamboozle today, but it's for the best. I has a Deuce instead.

101 spectacular nonfiction stories [long] at Byliner.com. Mostly linking this so I have stuff to read at work next week.

I had a stress dream about work last night. :| Let's not do that on the weekends, hmm, brain?

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My correct pills were indeed hostage in the mailbox. \o/ And this morning I took one. And now I am UP UP UP oh god my brain is like WOW THAT'S A BURST OF SEROTONIN RIGHT THERE not sure if it should be processed as an anxiety attack or just WHEEEEE.

This will even out in a day or two. Right now I kind of want to run some laps or write ALL THE THINGS, except I can't focus enough to do that.

Forgot to booklog the book I finished the other day-
Midnight Come Again, Dana Stabenow. Kate Shugak book #10. Ms. Stabenow, if you wanted to change Kate fundamentally and redo the scope of the books as a whole and change love interests and generally write something in a new direction, why didn't you start a new series instead of contriving a situation to break Kate in half and then rebuild her? Because I like Kate and it makes me really sad that you did that to her. She was so broken. :( And I don't know this new Kate as well. :( Maybe I'll come to like her over the next EIGHT BOOKS. Which I am taking a break before reading, because money and also I need a breather after your stubborn insistence on Russian villains for this one (well. MacGuffins. the real plot was Kate healing/changing, the Russian plot was very much on the side). At least you weren't quite as xenophobic as you were with the Germans in Hunter's Moon. B- for effort!

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1. This morning my car wouldn't start. Luckily there's a bus that goes from by my building to right by my office, so I just hopped the bus and decided I would worry about it later. Then after work alpheratz came over, we jumped it, and then drove to Gaithersburg for cupcakes to run the battery back up. Adventures. I think I talked her ear off the whole time about Waybros. This is the way I am.

2. The saga of my fucked-up brainmeds continues. Short version: the replacement, correct meds may or may not be in my mailbox right now. The front desk can't open it for me, my roommate has the only key (we lost the other one, I don't know), and she can't find her keys, so I can't check. Hopefully she will find them soon.
2a. Also, when I do get them, the statement with them may or may not indicate that the amount I'm being charged in copay for wanting the name version instead of the generic (because the generic doesn't work on my brain; thanks, brain) may be more than I can afford. In which case, half-working generic forever, or throwing darts at a board to find a new drug! ADVENTURES.

3. Work is a shitshow. Applying for other jobs is a shitshow.

4. I have too many feelings and need to have some of them removed.

5. I was going to slip into a nice easy retirement from writing, I had a whole plan, it was going to be great. Instead I somehow once again have a list of fics I want to write.
- finish the Gabe/Mikey, Gabe/Mikey/Travie I didn't finish for Wave 1
- Pete/Gabe college AU
- Mikey Way, Vampire Bodyguard
- Mikey Way, Ultramarathon Runner
- Mikey Way Gets Abducted And Then Comforted A Lot
- Pete/Gabe, The One Where They Hooked Up Early On And It Was Awful Drug-Fueled Hatesex And They Both Think They Lost Their Opportunity To Be Together, But Then There Are Rom-Com Shenanigans And They End Up Kissing In The Rain

NOBODY WANTS TO READ THIS STUFF. I WAS GOING TO RETIRE. I WOULD HAVE A RETIRED-LADY HAT AND THE WHOLE THING. God, need to tell stories, why are you like this.

I'm going to eat a cupcake and try to find my roommate's keys WITH MY MIND.

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This was going to be "Mikey comes out as bi" fic for queer_fest, before I decided I wasn't doing queer_fest. I was going to write it anyway, but I'm scrapping it for a variety of reasons, one of which is that it's really hard and also probably pretty inappropriate to try to write a serious examination of coming out and identity in the format of a James Montgomery interview. Doubly so when mostly you (I) use the format to take pot-shots at MCR's habit of firing their drummers.

This is in disconnected snippets, not narrative format.

( Sorry, JMont )

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This was going to be twisty dubcon-ish Kobra/Korse, where Kobra was selling himself to Korse to buy supplies for the Killjoys. It's been sitting on my hard drive for over a year now and clearly is not going anywhere, so. Here's what there is of it.

( Mikey knows that Gerard sees him leave. )

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1. Thinking about Mikeyway: Ultramarathon Runner again. alpheratz helped me come up with a beginning for it yesterday. Gentle AUs are a good thing. For values of "gentle" that include "Mikey runs 100-mile races, losing his toenails and his body's ability to regulate its temperature" <-- things I have learned from researching ultramarathon running.

2. Coffee makes me sick a goodly enough percentage of the time that I really just need to stop drinking coffee. Why can I not remember this? <-- reason that I am in terrible pain while writing this.

3. My birthday's in a little over two weeks. What should I give to you all? <-- no, really.

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